Shake things up
Door: Sanne Holtslag
24 Februari 2013 | Cambodja, Phnom-Penh
‘You know you have two things against you here. One, you are young. Two, you are a woman. And there’s nothing you can do about that, but it makes your work twice as hard as mine, at least here in Cambodia.’ Richard, the 63 year old VSO governance program manager from the UK looks at me, with empathy in his eyes, while making his statement. We are sitting in lounge-chairs on a white sandy beach, lined with palm trees, two coconuts in front of us, sun setting into the blue sea (it’s a hard job, but someone’s got to do it ;-) ) . We are winding down after a day of team training and evaluating VSO’s strategic plan. Although I don’t officially belong to VSO staff I have been invited to join their three-day-training, giving input from the research I’m doing and facilitating a session on inclusion.
‘But you have to remind yourself: it is never your fault! Part of your job here is to shake things up, push against these existing hierarchical structures,’ Richard concludes, looking at me straight as to make sure that I fully realize what he says. I just shared with him some of my experiences during my last fieldtrip into a northern province of Cambodia. Although working together with the staff of the local organizations went really well, I was having problems getting a manager from one organization to cooperate. Since any direct confrontation or disagreement is avoided in Cambodian culture, a tool to show your discontent is to provide the least cooperation possible. During my field-visit this ranged from not showing up for a meeting that I organized, refusing to look at me when I asked something and making comments that I would not understand what he said since I was not long enough in Cambodia en too young to have enough experience. Only afterwards, while talking to my Cambodian translator, I realized the behavior of the manager was some kind of revenge. In my preparations for the fieldtrip I had addressed the director of the organization once with a request for some information, by-passing the manager who was appointed to me to assist me preparing the fieldtrip. Right. How could I have been so inconsiderate… ?
‘Now, this character, this manager, would never have dreamt about behaving like that if I had been in your place’, Richard mutters while he sits back in his chair. It feels comforting that Richard is on my side. And at that point I realize that perhaps the most important thing about working in a culture that is not your own to have a couple of Richards. Because, honestly, my experiences in Cambodia are mostly fantastic; with friendly and inspiring people, buzzling markets, and beautiful nature. But I couldn’t enjoy it as much if I could not share these ‘one-of-those-days’ frustrations. To get the recognition from another foreigner that, yes, this country is indeed crazy and the cultural rules don’t make any sense. So that when it happens again, I can just laugh about it and carry on.
‘But you have to remind yourself: it is never your fault! Part of your job here is to shake things up, push against these existing hierarchical structures,’ Richard concludes, looking at me straight as to make sure that I fully realize what he says. I just shared with him some of my experiences during my last fieldtrip into a northern province of Cambodia. Although working together with the staff of the local organizations went really well, I was having problems getting a manager from one organization to cooperate. Since any direct confrontation or disagreement is avoided in Cambodian culture, a tool to show your discontent is to provide the least cooperation possible. During my field-visit this ranged from not showing up for a meeting that I organized, refusing to look at me when I asked something and making comments that I would not understand what he said since I was not long enough in Cambodia en too young to have enough experience. Only afterwards, while talking to my Cambodian translator, I realized the behavior of the manager was some kind of revenge. In my preparations for the fieldtrip I had addressed the director of the organization once with a request for some information, by-passing the manager who was appointed to me to assist me preparing the fieldtrip. Right. How could I have been so inconsiderate… ?
‘Now, this character, this manager, would never have dreamt about behaving like that if I had been in your place’, Richard mutters while he sits back in his chair. It feels comforting that Richard is on my side. And at that point I realize that perhaps the most important thing about working in a culture that is not your own to have a couple of Richards. Because, honestly, my experiences in Cambodia are mostly fantastic; with friendly and inspiring people, buzzling markets, and beautiful nature. But I couldn’t enjoy it as much if I could not share these ‘one-of-those-days’ frustrations. To get the recognition from another foreigner that, yes, this country is indeed crazy and the cultural rules don’t make any sense. So that when it happens again, I can just laugh about it and carry on.
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24 Februari 2013 - 14:12
Neel:
Hey, leuk weer een berichtje te lezen!!
Ben benieuwd wat de reactie zou zijn van niet een regular shake maar de Harlem Shake!!
Just kidding, blijf genieten. Zeker ook van die vervelende kokosnoten.. het witte wat hier weer naar beneden valt voor de 5e x dit jaar is nogal smakeloos en koud.
Liefs Neel -
24 Februari 2013 - 15:23
Ranjana:
Hoi Sanne,
Jouw bericht is weer goed en leuk. Geniet met jouw baan!
Liefs,
Ranjana
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26 Februari 2013 - 10:33
Karin Kortenhorst:
Leuk van je te horen. Wat moet je alert zijn op alle 'tekens' van iedereen.
Net terug van Istanbul met Lies en Dana. Heerlijk om in een nieuwe omgeving te zijn waar ik nog niet eerder was. En gezellig met ons drieën.
Succes daar.
Liefs en kus. Karin -
28 Februari 2013 - 12:08
Jozefien:
Hoi Sanne,
Kokosnoten, mooi wit strand en blauwe zee. Ff genieten. Dank voor je verhalen, mooi om te lezen, respect voor wat je doet.
Groetjes uit het koude Nederland,
Jozefien -
02 Maart 2013 - 20:43
Lies:
Hallo Sanne,
Mooi bericht. Ja,het bepraten en ervaren waarom de dingen gaan zoals ze gaan: dat zijn zaken van belang. Die vergeet je niet meer. Nog een goede tijd daar.. De lente is ook hier eindelijk aan het doorbreken. Met een merel naast me de tuin gespit vandaag. Joep!
liefs van Lies
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05 Maart 2013 - 13:42
Ankie:
Lieve stoere Sanne,
wat doe je het fantastisch en wat schrijf je wederom boeiend! En gelukkig zijn er "Richards" om je weer even op het goede (denk)pad te zetten.
Wat een tijd zo hè, ontdekken, leren, accepteren en goede moed houden; dat is wel het interessante van abroad zijn :-) en dat is dan ook nog je werk, wwhoeiiii goed joh.
Ik ben goed aan het bijkomen van een rottig ski-ongeluk, 4 weken geleden, maar het gaat naar omstandigheden goed. Heb knie en bovenarm gebroken en schuif voorlopig in een rolstoel door het huis.
Mijn 1e grote uitje was afgelopen zondag: familiedag in Voorst, heerlijk. Ria heeft veel over jou en je werk verteld en wie weet heb je al zicht op een nieuwe baan, begrepen we. Goed nieuws!
Take care and big hug,
Ankie
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